Asshole Astrology by James Garside

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Asshole Astrology: Month of April 2022
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Asshole Astrology: Month of April 2022

Horoscopes for horrible people

James Garside
Apr 1
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Tough Love Astrology — Horoscopes for horrible people
Horoscopes | Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

Someone kindly described my horoscope column as unique. 

I have a unique column. This is what I’m saying.

Instead of pranking people for April Fools Day I’ve decided to embark upon a bunch of foolhardy exploits. 

For example, I plan to: Write a book, invest in the stock market, and leave the house.

Then again, I’ve not finished my cup of tea yet.

Here’s the latest horoscope for your sign.

It doesn’t matter when you read it, or which sign you are, as horoscopes are all made up.

What does the universe have in store for you? Let’s find out.

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